Something else gross (in a different way)

I've been competing in the local Rock, Paper, Scissors tournament. There are 3 qualifying rounds for the Finals at the end of June. In the first qualifying round, I was eliminated in the semi-finals by Anne. (Especially given that her RPS game was Lady MacDeath. Hot.) Fine. There's nothing undignified about that particularly. Last week, however, I was defeated in the first bout by a dude playing as Edward Sassorpanties.

Edward Sassorpanties. 

Panties. I know I'm not alone in my dislike of that word. 

Sassor. Sassor? Um... sassor. "Sassor" is not a word. It does not even sound like a word. At all really. 

Again, panties. Can I reiterate that this was a man?

Now, I had considered playing as Emily Scissorhands. Because "scissors" and "hands" both relate to Rock, Paper, Scissors. However, Sassorpanties has nothing to do with RPS, because, again, "sassor" isn't even a word and panties weren't involved, because it wasn't Strip Rock, Paper, Scissors. (If you'd seen Edward Sassorpanties, you'd understand how happy I was that no stripping or panties were involved.) So yeah, Sassorpanties removed everything that was great about referencing Edward Scissorhands and kept only Edward. Poor choice, Sassor.

Sigh. Sassor.

You may be wondering about my Roshambo name. The first time I played as The Striking Viking and this time I played as Courtney Glove. So I'm still pondering my best name. I mean, I could reuse one of those, but they haven't panned out that well I guess... Other considerations: Em.C.Hammer, Lindsay No-hands, The Paper Doll. I'm accepting suggestions.